The feeling of being inadequate. Think differently!

𝐼𝑡'𝑠 𝑜𝑛𝑒 𝑜𝑓 𝑡ℎ𝑜𝑠𝑒 𝑑𝑎𝑦𝑠, 𝑤ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑒 𝐼 𝑐𝑎𝑛 𝑛𝑜𝑡 𝑠𝑒𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑙𝑖𝑔ℎ𝑡 𝑎𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑒𝑛𝑑 𝑜𝑓 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑡𝑢𝑛𝑛𝑒𝑙. 𝐼'𝑚 𝑓𝑖𝑔ℎ𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑠𝑜𝑚𝑒 𝑑𝑒𝑚𝑜𝑛𝑠 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝐼 ℎ𝑎𝑣𝑒𝑛'𝑡 𝑠ℎ𝑎𝑟𝑒𝑑 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑎𝑛𝑦𝑜𝑛𝑒, 𝑎𝑝𝑎𝑟𝑡 𝑓𝑟𝑜𝑚 𝑚𝑦 𝑝𝑎𝑟𝑡𝑛𝑒𝑟 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑠𝑖𝑠𝑡𝑒𝑟...

Thinking back to when I first started the fearful rider page, it's all so surreal for me. I want to share the reasons I decided to create this blog, the blog that has given me so many opportunities and put me in contact with people I would admire on Horse and Country...

If it wasn't for you loyal followers I probably would of given up a long time ago so, let me just say Thank you 🙂

I created this blog for the individual who was just like me, grew up on the edge of the country side in a non horsey family (Well my Nana was horsey and my sister) But we didn't grow up having ponies nor having regular riding lessons. In fact my sister would jump on the gypsy horses tackles, as you can see she was a lot braver than I am or will ever be! We grew up on a council estate with all the odds against us. We had fabulous times and some pretty dark times but when worse comes to worse we had our family.

After my mum passed away I decided I needed to get into horses properly to give me some sense of responsibility and security.

I took myself to a farm to see if I could land a job working part time with horses, I was about 15 at the time...

I remember being this VERY nervous, unknowledgeable introvert who just wanted someone to take her under their wing and show me the ropes. I didn't have anything to offer but passion and dedicated. I had this scrap book which was filled with notes/pictures of all the self learning I have done to show how determined I am, I remember the person "Interviewing" me having a smirk on their face whilst they completely ignored this scrap book I treasured. I felt so stupid and defeated.

This was one of many horrible encounters I have had as a person new to the equine world and where I am now. But, we will leave it there I always seem to get myself into some sort of trouble when I over share!

Anyway, back to the point. After my failed attempts trying to get into the equine world I thought I should try look for a successful horse person who started out like me... Of course I could not find one (I'm sure there are lots) But I couldn't find any. They may have shared some aspects but most had the privilege of growing up around horses. So they were years ahead of me... Years! At the time I did not think it was possible, I was overwhelmed with all the work I would need to put in and I tell you it was a HUGE learning curve in such a short amount of time.

Fast forward four years later and I decided to create the fearful rider. For those equestrians just starting out and are dealing with the snobbery of the equestrian world. Those who struggle with self-esteem due to negative comments, those who are terrified to fail, those who have riding fears with no support. Those who come into the horse world for the love of the horse and nothing else. This page is solely for you! It shows you it's possible...

I have only been involved with horses properly since 2017. Within those four years I've owned a youngster that I backed (With help off friends), I've come on leaps and bounds with my riding. I've smashed personal goals, bought my second pony, learned, studied, spoken to some icons that love the idea of this page, started teaching and holding online events, created online competitions, built an amazing community, earned some amazing sponsorships all whilst dealing with slander, jealousy and hatred.

So today I may be feeling like a waste of space, like people look down their nose at me (They do), feeling like I won't get where I ant to be and worried about the future. But that's ok, I can look back at this post and just think 𝑖𝑚𝑎𝑔𝑖𝑛𝑒 𝑤ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑒 𝑎𝑛𝑜𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟 4 𝑦𝑒𝑎𝑟𝑠 𝑤𝑖𝑙𝑙 𝑡𝑎𝑘𝑒 𝑚𝑒?

If you are just starting out or your an experienced equestrian you can do it, the light shines bright at the end of that tunnel. Keep chipping away....

Advocate for: Stop Bullying in Equestrian Sports ♥️